From Dwight Schrute's Beet Farm: Lamebook.com

Well I have for quite some time been very anti-websites where people can complain about how unfortunate their lives are (ie: FML.com and textsfromlast.gay). But this site... is like a fun collage of lame people on facebook (kinda like E's the soup for facebook).

This site has done an extraordinary job of displaying all the lameness that plagues our facebook pages, including: constant and pointless status updates, stupid arguments over facebook because of pictures, a person changing their relationship status every two days, and much more...

so here is http://www.lamebook.com , congrats, you have the support of BRL.

From the Houston Texans Sideline: Rexy Back!

This is in no way a reaction to Cutler's poor performance last saturday (come on, its the preseason). I just found this on one of my favorite blogs (Startkyleorton.blogspot.com), and felt the need to post this.

I always loved you Rex (except when you played at Florida (fuck the gators)), in good and in bad. It was tough to see that the bears let you go, but i hope you find your way back onto the field in houston, and throw the ball all over hell. We love you Rex, gone but not forgotten (We love you too Kyle).

From Dwight Schrute's Beet Farm: An Ode to Barney Stinson

This is long overdue, Barney Stinson has been a huge inspiration to BRL for quite sometime, and BRL will now take this time to honor him:




Indeed you are good sir.

Brother Ali - Fresh Air

Finally Brother Ali's first single off of his upcoming album, Us is available.

The mp3 is not available yet, but you can buy it off of iTunes or amazon for 99cents. Us will be released September 22nd!

From Dwight Schrute's Beet Farm: Stewie Griffin is Gay!

The NY Daily News reports:

Seth MacFarlane is finally spilling the secrets of "Family Guy" — including the fact that, yes, baby Stewie is gay.

"We had an episode that went all the way to the script phase in which Stewie does come out,” MacFarlane, the show’s creator, says in the September issue of Playboy magazine. “It had to do with the harassment he took from other kids at school. He ends up going back in time to prevent a passage in Leviticus from being written: ‘Thou shalt not lie with mankind as with womankind. It is an abomination.’

"But we decided it’s better to keep it vague, which makes more sense because he’s a 1-year-old. Ultimately, Stewie will be gay or a very unhappy repressed heterosexual. It also explains why he’s so hellbent on killing [his mother, Lois] and taking over the world: He has a lot of aggression, which comes from confusion and uncertainty about his orientation."

In the issue — on stands tomorrow — MacFarlane also weighs in on why Protestant Lois seems to have a Jewish accent.

"Watch this season!” he says. “Lois finds out she is, in fact, Jewish.”

As for his advice to girls who are like Meg (the nerdy, unpopular sister), the funnyman says, “I guess maybe her parents aren’t as loving as they should be. As a result, I would say, ‘Your parents are a—holes. Get out of the house as soon as you can.”

The hit Fox show, which kicks off its eighth season on Sept. 27, has even generated a spinoff, “The Cleveland Show,” which focuses on main character Peter Griffin’s neighbor pal Cleveland Brown. Fans of the program will be happy to know that there will definitely be some crossover between the two shows.

But how did Cleveland — who some fans consider one of “Family Guy’s” least-interesting characters — score his own series?

“Cleveland is soulful and dimensional,” MacFarlane says. “Maybe he didn’t have enough to do [on “Family Guy”], and as a result, he came off dull. He makes a point of saying that in ‘The Cleveland Show’ pilot: ‘I’m sick of being just an accessory to Peter’s world. I’ve got my own s—t going on.”

Rhymes: What the Ef is a B.o.B (Bobby Ray)?

The second installment of BRL's What the Ef series comes from none other than the ATL. Bobby Ray (aka B.o.B) has been making a name for himself for over a year now appearing on T.I.'s latest album, touring with the likes of Asher Roth and Pac Div, and appearing on XXL's freshman 10 last year. His upcoming album, Adventures of Bobby Ray boasts the amazing single, "I'll Be in the Sky". Bobby Ray is probably the most talented member from the Freshman 10, as he can rap/sing/play guitar/piano and more. He has gotten comparisons to Andre 3000, and the video below is why i think he's gponna be a star very soon...


Also here is a link to the song that he is featured on from Cobro Starship called "The World Will Never Do" its great.
http://usershare.net/yjvz54vrjggp

Rhymes: #8 Greatest Album of All Time: Radiohead "In Rainbows"

This album was released out of nowhere on October 10, 2007 digitally. Thom and the boys didn't inform the public that they had finished their first album in 4 years until a week before its release. And after that the internet went NUTS. Everywhere I looked I saw nothing but Radiohead this and Radiohead that. Up until that all I knew about Radiohead was that Kanye,Lupe,&Pharell rapped over a song by the lead singer of the band and they did a cameo on South Park.

But on October 12 (My birthday), that all changed. Curiousity got the best of me, I donwloaded the album for free, and it was...different. It was so unlike any music I had ever heard, it was short so I listened to it again, then again, then I finally got it. In Rainbows is the most beautiful album I've ever heard. It is a Pablo Picasso painting in form of a ten track album.

After loving In Rainbows, I went out and bought 2 other Radiohead albums that also appear on this list (Ok Computer and Kid A), and Thom and the boys became my favorite band.

Here's footage of my first ever concert...

From Lady Gaga's Underpants: Disco Stick.

(if you dont want to hear her talk (who would), fast forward to about 0:59 to see her little surprise)

The international rumor mill is on fire, with the notion that Lady Gaga might be a hermaphrodite. There is an image on the net that seems to show her having a bozacker coming out of her mini-dress. This would definitely affect her allure, but maybe that's not a bad thing. I'm sure there are folks that would like her even more if she was both man and woman. Here is an alleged quote by the one they call Gaga.

"Its not something that I’m ashamed of, just isn’t something that i go around telling everyone. Yes. I have both male and female genitalia, but i consider myself a female. Its just a little bit of a penis and really doesn’t interfere much with my life. the reason I haven’t talked about it is that its not a big deal to me. like come on. its not like we all go around talking about our vags. I think this is a great opportunity to make other multiple gendered people feel more comfortable with their bodies. I’m sexy, I’m hot. i have both a poon and a peener. big f*cking deal.


- L8d Gaga

Rhymes & Life: Feels Like Home vol 1 (Playlist)

This is a playlist I made full of songs about home, that have inspired my next ablum.

1. Ben Gibbard - You Remind Me of Home
2. Dear Juliet - Take Me Away
3. Kanye West - Home (Original Version)
4. Nina Simone - I'm Going Back Home
5. Norah Jones - The Long Way Home
6. Bob Dylan - House of the Rising Sun
7. Nirvana - Sliver
8. Sage Francis - Keep Moving
9. Audioslave - Like a Stone
10. Crosby, Stills, Nash, & Young - Ohio
11. Bowling for Soup - Ohio (Come Back to Texas)
12. M.Ward & Zooey Deschanel - Bring it Back Home
13. Bob Dylan - Like a Rolling Stone
14. Feist & Ben Gibbard - Train Song
15. Atmosphere - Always Coming Back Home to You (Acoustic)

From the Local Family Video: Stupid Movie Night vol #3

It has been a while since we've had a stupid movie night, but last night was one for the ages. Ski, Craig, Smorz, Kimmy, and I all went to Family Video and we came across a wonderful independent film titled, The Cook.


The Cook is your basic slasher film, where the Hungarian Cook (or as the characters referred to him in movie, Hungry Cook)murders members of a sororiety who stayed in the house over spring break. Initially this movie strives in excellence as it has all of the prerequisites to a SMN classic, pointless nudity, piss poor dialogue, awkward camera angles, low quality camera, and just atrocious acting.

The Cook goes above and beyond though, in addition to the aforementioned prerequisites listed, the film includes several lesbian scenes, a nice little scene where it references Holloween 4: The Final Chapter, brilliant one liners that will likely be repeated by viewers on a regular basis (ie: I AM COOK!!), and realistic violence and gore, which is sure to make your stomach turn a little.

This movie was very difficult to rate because initially it checks out in everything that makes a stupid movie, but questions are raised as to whether or not it was intentionally bad or not and whether or not that should affect the rating system of SMN. We believe that this movie is intentionally a comedy/gore film, but we decided to not let this affect its rating, as it is essentially a stupid movie. The ending, however is a little disappointing, but the cut outs and extras that play during the credits are pretty funny.

SMN Rating : 8.5/10

Rhymes: Songs for the Walk Home EP (Free Download)

This is my new EP, Songs for the Walk Home. It consists of 3 new songs that will appear on my upcoming album, A Dorm is Not a Home, which will be released in winter 2010. It also includes the original version of "A Song for the walk Home", which i posted the music video to back in May.

Download Here: http://usershare.net/08pmkdbwmg8i

also more information on my music go to: www.myspace.com/gooseohio
www.soundclick.com/gooseohio and www.twitter.com/goose96

Feist + Ben Gibbard - "Train Song"

This song is amazing, it is a cover done by Ben Gibbard (of Death Cab for Cutie) and Feist. It is from a compilation featuring 31 tracks (mostly covers I believe), titled Dark was the Night, which was released last February.

Rhymes: Brother Ali "Us" (Video)

Brother Ali's 3rd album, Us is due out September 22!


TRACK LISTING;
1. Brothers and Sisters feat. Chuck D. & Stokley Williams
2. The Preacher
3. Crown Jewel
4. House Keys
5. Fresh Air
6. Tight Rope
7. Breakin' Dawn
8. The Travelers
9. Babygirl
10. 'Round Here
11. Bad Mufucker Pt. II
12. Best@it feat. Freeway & Joell Ortiz
13. Games
14. Slippin' Away
15. You Say (Puppy Love)
16. US feat. Stokley Williams

Life: SHARK WEEK!!!

Finally the best time of the year is upon us, Dicovery Channel's shark week. Here is a short clip of what you can expect from this phenominal programming:

From Dwight Schrute's Sheet Music: Fiery Furnaces release "Silent" album

It seems like every other Fiery Furnaces album is based on some wacky idea possibly conceived while drunk: "Let's get grandma to sing on our album!" or "Let's cover the album we just put out-- twice!" And now there's a new one: "Let's just put out sheet music then get fans to play said sheet music at shows!"

Such is the concept for an upcoming Fiery Furnaces "release" called Silent Record, according to a post on their website. "Since bands can no longer sell audio, FF decline to provide it," it says.

Could this be the new business model the music industry is desperate for?! Can actual mortals play any of Matt Friedberger's compositions?! What would John Cage do?! Etc.

"Because file-sharing, or downloading, or whatever, has notoriously, or supposedly, made the production of the conventional 'with-audio' record obsolete, the Fiery Furnaces will release a Silent Record," goes the characteristically verbose post. Read the rest below:

The Fiery Furnaces' next album will consist of instruction, conventional music notation, graphic music notation, reports and illustrations of previous hypothetical performances, reports and illustrations of hypothetical performances previous to the formation of their hypotheses, guidelines for the fabrication of semi-automatic machine rock, memoranda to the nonexistent Central Committee of the Fiery-Furnaces-in-Exile concerning the non-creation of situations, Relevant to Progressive Rock Division, conceptual constellations on a so-to-speak black cloth firmament, and other items that have nothing to do with the price of eggs, or milk, or whatever the proverbial expression ceased to be.

In other words, a Silent Record. You will note that there have been countless Anticipatory Plagiarisms of this endeavor. For instance, more than a millennium of sheet music. We hope to have learned from their numerous mistakes.

Upon release of the record, the band will organize a series of Fan-Band concerts, in which groups of perfectly ordinary Fiery Furnaces' fans will perform, interpret, contradict, ignore, and so on, the compositions that make up Silent Record. Write to thefieryfurnacesemail@gmail.com to nominate your post office break room, truck stop parking lot, municipal arts center, local tavern, or what-its-name to host one of these 'happenings'. By 'happenings' I mean, what will be in the future, perfectly normal rock shows. And propose yourself for Fan Band participation.

No experience necessary.

(Swiped from Pitchfork.com)

Its been a long time, I shouldnt have left you, with no dope beets to step to...

I took the month of July off from BRL for obvious reasons, I was getting too famous. Now normally this really isn't much of a problem, but in July celebs were dropping left and right, and I wasn't about to be one of them. Here is a list of notable deaths from late June to late July 2009:

June:
23: Ed McMahon, 86, American television host (Star Search) and announcer (The Tonight Show)
25: Farrah Fawcett, 62, American actress (Charlie's Angels), anal cancer.
Michael Jackson, 50, American pop singer–songwriter, cardiac arrest.
28: Billy Mays, 50, American pitchman and television host (Pitchmen), hypertensive heart disease.

July:
4: Allen Klein, 77, American businessman, Beatles and Rolling Stones manager, Alzheimer's disease.
Steve McNair, 36, American football player (Tennessee Titans, Baltimore Ravens), shot.
8: Waldo McBurney, 106, American beekeeper, oldest worker in the United States.
17: Walter Cronkite, 92, American television news anchor, cerebrovascular disease.
23: Danny McBride, 63, American singer-songwriter (Sha Na Na).
31: Baatin, 35, American rapper (Slum Village).